Why does it hurt so much when you face failure ?
Why is rejection so painful ?
Why do you think so much before admitting you are wrong ?
The answer to all these problems lie in our attachment to objects. It is because we identify ourselves with these objects or ideas. Pain is caused when we lose these objects or have to let go these ideas. As a student you may not come to terms with doing bad in the exam or worse yet with failing the exams because you identify yourself as a good student or you identify yourself with a good result.
Doing bad or failing in the exams results in the loss of this familiar self identity. Loss of identity or loss of concept of the self is naturally painful. Rejection in love is also very painful. So I have learnt. This I think is because the person in love identifies himself with the concept of the couple, with the concept of falling in love.
Rejection leads to loss of this identity thus leading to pain. Admitting that you are wrong is painful for a similar reason( more so for the male species. Trust me on this one.) We have too much at stake or so we believe when we lose our righteousness. Along with this we lose our self image. We lose along with it , some respect from others.
Thus all forms of pain and melancholy results from losing something we possess, or identify ourselves with. The solution to the problem or liberation from pain lies in not attaching ourselves with objects and concepts. This is the principle of detachment or dispassion.The practice of detachment is extremely simple if you realize one idea.
The idea can be put in a single sentence. It is "You have a mind and body". Yes, you have a mind and body. If you still have not got the significance of this simple sentence, let me eloberate it for you. What I mean by the sentence is that You, the possessor , have the possession of the entities called the mind and the body. You, the possessor are not the mind and the body, the mind and the body are possessed by you.
The relation between you and your mind is that of a rider and a horse, between a master and a slave. You cannot possibly control the mind unless you realize that you are distinct and separate from it. What I suggest is not that you are the spirit, the Atman, or Brahma or any such thing. What I suggest is that you, your identity is and should be highest function of the brain. Your identity should be the highest function and should operate at a level above all else.
You are separate from your body and your mind. Most importantly you are in control of your mind and body. Initially like a wild horse you mind will resist control, but if you persevere( I am still trying) , the mind like the horse calms down having found its true master.As you are reading this sentence I want you to observe yourself reading this sentence. I want you to continue this effort for a while. I want you to observe yourself trying to think as you are reading this paragraph. If you are successful in this effort, then I must have convinced you that you are distinct from your mind. You are the observer and the mind is the observed.
fascinating article... i read from the internet...
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